Lessons Learned

Bryce looking just like he was laughing at us! 21 weeks

Brendon with his hand up to his cheek. 21 weeks

These past 3 weeks have gone by in a blur. In so many ways we are lucky that from the time of diagnosis to surgery on the boys was just days apart. I've realized now that waiting could have been agony. I'm also so thankful that we were able to have the surgery done, I've heard from other women that weren't good candidates for the surgery, and then on Sunday a friend told me that one of her patients has kidney disease. A young patient that will likely begin to need dialysis soon. When she asked the mom what happened, the answer was Twin to Twin and she hadn't had surgery.

The boys continue to look great at check ups. We have one this week, and one next week, and then I'm back in town with Dr. Rowles! I'm eagerly awaiting that day. That is the day when we no longer spend full days driving to Seattle, we will no longer watch all of our income go into the gas tank, parking fees, and fast food lunches, and I won't have to sit in the scary bunny-boob-bikini art room that is University of Washington Medical Center's Maternal Infant Care Clinic. picture to follow if the waiting room isn't packed full of people



I believe that God had a plan in all of this. Just like He had a plan for me to get pregnant, and then to really throw Dana and I off with twins. He had a lesson for me, one that I've never wanted to learn. The most important lesson I'm taking from all of this is that I don't have to be so independent.



My stubborn independence permeates my life. Some time ask Dana how many times I've actually cried because I was scared, or upset. Unless it's tears of frustration, even Dana and the kids don't see me cry. I just don't cry in front of other people, maybe I fear it shows weakness.


I don't like to ask for help. I don't ask for help carrying a box, or moving furniture, I just do it. When finances have been tight or non-existant, I've juggled and moved things to squeak us by, anything to keep from having to admit that I might need help. Even when it has come to prayer requests, I've always felt better asking people to pray for others, and not me.



Yet in the last month, all of that has changed. I've asked for prayers for me and the entire family not just from my moms devotional group, and not just from church, but from the whole wide blogging world. I've asked for help with meals during my week of bedrest and for some to stock in the freezer to eat after a long day in Seattle. I've asked for help with childcare and grocery shopping. I've even had to ask for temporary help with finances and gratefully accepted cash to help cover trip expenses.



It has been a hard lesson to learn. One that I don't think I would have learned had the lives of our boys not been endangered. And it's still a lesson in progress, as I struggle to write this and hit publish post. But, I'm thankful that I am learning the lesson, and I'm thankful for the good that has come from this experience. Dana and I are more dedicated than ever to working together to bring these boys into our family safe and healthy!